


Tenzou's Academy Adventures

by GordandV



Category: Naruto
Genre: AU, Gen, Tenzou's Academy Adventures, possibly crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-29
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-04-28 17:02:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5098385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GordandV/pseuds/GordandV
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or in which Tenzou goes to Kononha’s Academy under the order of the Hokage to get a certificate, Umino Iruka entertains an ANBU in his classroom, and Hatake Kakashi can’t face his kohai because of mandatory recess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. An A-Rank Endeavor

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome! V is very excited to post her new fanfiction. Some notes on it:
> 
> V has watched some of the Naruto anime, not all of it, and has never read the manga which means her knowledge of how it "ends" relies mostly on "spoilers" she has seen, movie knowledge, and influence from reading other fanfiction. (Which is why V considers this AU. If something doesn't line up with the canon, the reader can assume V either doesn't know what it should be like or has just forgotten. Naruto spans so many things that she sometimes get confused!)
> 
> V usually prefers the no-u spelling of Tenzou but decided to try the "u" this time. She also uses Tenzou/Yamato interchangeably.
> 
> V attempted to do research about Konoha's Academy but didn't find much while scouring the web.
> 
> This fanfiction was written purely for fun and isn't meant to be taken seriously. Characters are most likely OOC.

Chapter 1: An A-Rank Endeavor

“This is ridiculous.” Tenzou stared at his mission scroll and then looked helplessly at the ninja who had given it to him. “Are you sure this is for me?”

The ninja sighed and then glanced at the line behind Tenzou.

“Look,” he said. “I just hand out the missions, I don’t make them. If you have an issue, go talk to a superior.”

“Right. Yes. Thank you.”

Tenzou took a step back, mission clenched in one hand, other held up near his face, and then disappeared in a swirl of leaves and wind.

**********

“I don’t see the problem.”

Tenzou deflated. “But Lady Tsunade…”

“I thought I’d start you off easy,” Tsunade said distractedly.

“With an A-rank?” Tenzou asked. He shook the scroll. “Why is this even an A-rank in the first place?”

Tsunade looked up and her glossy lips slid into a smile.

“For some reason, teachers always tell me that herding thirty children into close quarters and giving them sharp things to throw is at least an A-rank endeavor. Some even claim S.”

Tenzou remained silent. Tsunade folded her arms across her chest.

“I meant what I said: I want you to start off easy, Yamato. You and half the village should still be under mandatory bedrest.”

Tenzou didn’t seem convinced. He face must have revealed that because Tsunade motioned to the mountains of paperwork on her desk. She frowned.

“I don’t have time to deal with you and your complaints about missions, Captain. Either take it or leave it, but you should probably check the reward money a second time.”

Tenzou did. He shook his head.

“All that just for this?” he asked.

Tsunade nodded.

Tenzou, Yamato, Kinoe, or whatever he was currently being called, had survived Orochimaru’s experimentations, Root, ANBU, and the Fourth Great Ninja War. And now he was on a mission to attend the Academy.

“Just go for a few days and write a report about what you learned in school,” Tsunade said dismissively. “It might be nice for you to see what an actual normal childhood consists of.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Right. The Academy. Where all potential ninja of Konoha started and learned the basics. Which meant children. Which meant showing up in full ANBU gear might be not be appropriate since ANBU had the reputation of being harbingers of death. Jonin flak vest it was.

Tenzou knocked on a slightly opened classroom door inside the Academy and then waited. He heard someone (presumably the teacher) clap his hands together in order to get the class’s attention.

“Now class, we have a very special guest who will be joining us for the next few days. I want everyone to be on their very best behavior.”

Tenzou heard footsteps and then the door opened.

“Iruka-sensei,” Tenzou greeted.

“Please, come in,” Iruka said and motioned. “Class, this is Captain Yamato. He’s on a very special mission.”

The classroom erupted into a single cohesive, “Good morning, Captain!”

Yamato accepted a piece of chalk from Iruka.

“Why don’t you write your name for the class, Captain?” Iruka suggested.

All hell broke loose when Yamato turned his back.

“Are you here to kill someone?”

“Have you killed anyone?”

“What’s your favorite jutsu?”

“Have you ever met the Hokage?”

“Have you ever died?”

It was barrage of questions, one after another, with no end in sight. Yamato slowly wrote his name on the chalkboard and Iruka waited a few moments before clapping his hands again. The noise died down immediately.

“What did I say about being on your best behavior?” Iruka chided. “Do we usually yell questions at people?”

“No, Sensei.”

Yamato turned back around to find almost thirty pairs of eyes train solely on him. He had been experimented on, sent on assassination missions as a child, and kidnapped, but having this many children staring at him was unnerving.

“Apologize to Captain Yamato, class. That was very rude.”

“Sorry, Captain.”

Yamato smiled and exchanged a look with Iruka who smiled in return: kids, what could you do?

“Now, if everyone behaves and we can get through our lesson, maybe, just maybe, Captain Yamato will answer a question for us,” Iruka continued. “If he would like to.”

Yamato nodded.

“There’s a seat in the back for you, Captain.”

Yamato was thankful: he had a row all his own. The children stared openly at him as he passed before Iruka regained their attention once their special guest was seated.

“Before Captain Yamato came in, what were we reviewing?”

A chorus of “hand seals!” rang in the classroom.

“And which ones had we already done?”

The class broke out into motion as the children attempted to shout out the answers while making the accompanying hand signs. Yamato watched in amusement from his seat and even Iruka seemed entertained by the gestures.

“Let’s finish reviewing and then have a couple of volunteers demonstrate for the class,” Iruka said.

If this was what the Academy had to offer, Yamato thought, it wasn’t so bad. He had been in Iruka’s class for less than fifteen minutes, but all the children seem enthused about the lesson.

It was nice to see the would-be ninjas trying to help one another get the hand seal positons just right while Iruka made his rounds to help adjust each student one at a time. There were giggles and chattering all around, and Yamato looked up when Iruka paused by his seat.

“Do you need any help, Captain?” he asked with a grin.

Iruka knew what a farce this mission was just as much as Yamato did: so what if Yamato didn’t officially have a graduation diploma from the Academy? (Or any academy? Or a real name?) He was an ANBU captain. And since the Fourth Great Ninja War, more than a few documents had gone missing or been destroyed. Yamato’s official paperwork should have been on the bottom of the list of things to get done or fixed.

“I think I’m alright,” Yamato replied evenly before flashing through the hand seals.

“Very impressive,” Iruka said with an approving nod. “I think I found my last volunteer who can show the class that practice makes perfect.”

Or constant repetition out of boredom, Yamato thought.

On some missions where there was lull and nothing else to do, challenging teammates to see who could do a series of hand seals the fastest was always a way to pass the time. Or seeing who could memorize the longest series of seals before making a mistake. (Kakashi was not invited to join these informal matches if the Sharingan was in anyway involved. Cheater.)

“And our final volunteer,” Iruka told his class, “Is Captain Yamato.”

The children sat on the edge of their seats as Yamato got up and headed to the front of the classroom.

“Captain Yamato is going to show us what everyone is capable of if they work hard and practice,” Iruka continued. “Captain, would you care to demonstrate?”

Yamato nodded and ran through the hand signs. The class shouted in amazement at the speed and accuracy.

“How did you _do_ that?”

“Is that magic?”

“Can I really do that, too?”

“How did you get so good?”

Yamato surveyed the class: this what he should have had as a childhood. Friends. Non-homicidal teachers. Lessons that didn’t revolve around how to kill a person efficiently. No unethical experimentation.

“Like Iruka-sensei said,” Yamato replied, “You need to practice in order to be this… good.”

Good. It was strange to consider his skills as something other than a necessity. He was talented. In least in the eyes of children. Even so…

“Before recess, everyone can write a question for Captain Yamato,” Iruka instructed once the lesson was over. “I’ll pick one to ask before school is dismissed today.” Iruka paused when the class cheered. “ _If_ everyone behaves this afternoon and listens to the lesson.”

“I never knew bribery was such a useful instrument for learning,” Yamato remarked once the classroom was empty, leaving him and Iruka alone.

“It works in most instances,” Iruka replied with a sigh as he tidied his desk. “It helps when I bribe them with something they want desperately. In this case, to ask Captain Yamato a question.”

“I usually just use fear to instill important lessons,” Yamato said offhandedly. “Like teamwork.”

Iruka raised an eyebrow but didn’t dare question the comment.

“Thank you for demonstrating, Captain. I think you really impressed my students and they’ll be eager to practice their seals.”

Yamato leaned against Iruka’s desk.

“If you don’t mind me asking, why couldn’t you have just demonstrated?”

Iruka smiled. “Because I’m Iruka-sensei, not Captain Yamato. I’m not as exciting as you are. I’m just a teacher, I don’t go out on missions.”

“Do your students know that you used to go out on missions?” Yamato questioned. He smiled slyly. “Or with who?”

Iruka’s smile faltered. “You will not tell my class that I ever went on a mission with Hatake Kakashi. Ever.”

“Why not? I’m sure they’d be eager to listen if you revealed that you went out with Konoha’s Copy-nin.”

Yamato sounded amused. Iruka frowned and shuffled his papers.

“Aside from the fact that the mission we’re speaking about essentially ended my going out on them?” Iruka replied evenly.

Yamato sobered. “Iruka-sensei, I’m sorry. I didn’t-”

Iruka held a hand up. He smiled faintly.

“It’s fine, Captain Yamato. That mission actually made me realize how much I wanted to teach and where my place in the world was.”

The two were silent for a few seconds before Iruka glanced at the window.

“I know this mission isn’t exactly your usual business,” he said, “But you’re more than welcome to join recess.”

“Recess?”

Iruka nodded. “My students get to run around outside for a bit. It gives them a chance to stretch their legs and get some energy out before the afternoon lesson. I would join if I didn’t have papers to grade, but you’re welcome to join them.”

Recess. Yamato didn’t think he had ever had recess in his life. At least not that he remembered.

“And I can just… go out?” he asked.

Iruka nodded distractedly as he sat down.

“If you’d like to. You can have lunch in here if you’d prefer.”

“I didn’t bring lunch,” Yamato admitted.

“Oh.” Iruka tapped his chin and then pointed to the door. “There’s a vending machine down the hall.”

Yamato nodded. “I think I’ll go outside for a bit. Thank you, Iruka-sensei.”

Iruka offered a wave. “See you in an hour.”


	2. Sit on the Swing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short and silly chapter today.

Chapter 2: Sit on the Swing

Yamato remained by the door that led out into the open courtyard. A few trees dotted the yard along with some wooden picnic tables. One tree with a swing was currently occupied by no less than five children who all seemed determined to fit together on the single plank. A few others chased one another back and forth and even more were spread out in the dirt and grass eating. The day was warm, the breeze gentle, and the quiet laughter altogether pleasant.

Yamato wondered if this was what recess usually consisted of, and if so, how he could join in without seeming suspicious: a grown ninja at the Academy taking lessons as an A-rank mission was strange enough. A grown ninja at the Academy taking lessons as an A-rank mission and voluntarily joining in on recess was even stranger. But if Iruka said _he_ joined recess, then surely there was a way for Yamato to experience it as well.

“Captain Yamato!”

Yamato watched a herd of children (classmates, Yamato’s inner voice reminded) rush over to him and crowd his knees. All were smiling and seemed overly eager judging by their inability to stand still. But no one said anything more than his name. Perhaps Iruka’s warning to behave with the adult had stuck with them?

“You ask him.”

“No, you!”

“You!”

“Captain Yamato?”

“Er, yes?” Yamato did his best to keep his voice gentle: he may not have had a “normal” childhood even by ninja standards, but Yamato knew how to interact with children despite not understanding them or what anyone on Team Seven might have said.

“Will you _please_ have lunch with us?” one girl asked as she stared up at him. “Please?”

More voices joined in with the pleading until it seemed like the entire class had gotten up to see what Yamato would say.

“Of course.”

Yamato winced at the deafening cries of delight. One boy grabbed his hand and began to drag him toward a tree.

“You can sit on the swing,” he announced.

That must have been the seat of honor because the children circled around as best they could while Yamato straddled the wood. They all sat down and watched the ninja expectedly. Yamato stared right back.

“Captain Yamato, why are you in the Academy?” someone asked once he had raised his hand. “Didn’t you graduate?”

“I’m here on a mission,” Yamato explained while his crowd listened with rapt attention. “I’m here to observe.”

His classmates whispered excitedly. Yamato looked down when someone, possibly a shy girl judging by her downwards cast gaze, tugged at his pant leg before offering her other hand.

“Do you want one, Captain Yamato? My Momma made them and she and Iruka-sensei say it’s nice to share.”

A small slice of apple was held out in her palm. The peel was shaved and cut to resemble a rabbit. Yamato took it with care.

“Thank you.”

And then suddenly students were getting up to grab their lunches in a rush before hurrying back to offer pieces to Yamato.

**********

“How was recess?” Iruka asked when Yamato filed back into the classroom along with his new friends: quite a few had attached themselves to his legs or grabbed fistfuls of his flak vest after a very stern warning not to poke around in any pockets or pouches.

“Interesting,” Yamato replied while the children slowly began to let go of him and return to their seats. “Your students are very generous: I didn’t need the vending machine.”

“And I trust that no one asked you anything inappropriate?” Iruka continued in a slightly louder voice with sidelong glance at his class.

“No, not one,” Yamato replied with a grin. “We mostly just stared at one another.”

“Oh. How… nice.”

The afternoon was much like the morning. Near the end of the day, the students began to grow restless. Iruka glanced at the clock and then picked up a slip of paper he had tucked beneath a book.

“Since everyone paid attention and didn’t both Captain Yamato too much, I have a question to ask him before class ends,” Iruka explained. “Almost everyone wrote down the same question.”

The class tittered excitedly.

“I happen to think it’s a very good one,” Iruka continued. “Captain Yamato, if you would?”

Yamato made his way to the front of the room while Iruka rested a hand on his hip and smiled. He began to read off the paper.

“Captain Yamato, what is your favorite technique?”

It was a very open-ended question, and for that, Yamato was thankful. He could say almost anything and it would certainly be welcomed with enthusiasm.

“I’m not sure I have a favorite,” Yamato began, and the class groaned. “Bu I do have a technique I use the most.”

No matter how artificial his bloodline limit was, it was something that Yamato used without thought. He performed the needed hand seals and then reached his left arm out which immediately turned into a large tree limb. The class clapped and made noises of approval. A few of Iruka’s more astute students seemed equal parts impressed and confused and one person even raised his hand.

“Captain Yamato, how did you do that? No one can use Wood Style anymore, not since the First Hokage.”

“Well, I can.”

And so could a number of other people who were either dead or had whereabouts unknown. But implying that Yamato could simply because he wanted to was certainly more remarkable.

“So cool!”

“Awesome!”

“Do it again!”

Yamato’s arm returned to normal. Iruka hid his surprise better than his students but applauded as well.

“Thank you, Captain. That was very impressive. Class dismissed, everyone.”

The children scurried out. Yamato lingered while Iruka gathered his books and papers.

“You’re not going to ask how I can use Wood Style?” Yamato wondered.

Iruka looked offended. “Of course not, that’s none of my business.”

“Aren’t you curious?”

Iruka snorted. “Of course! But I’m not rude enough to poke my nose where it doesn’t belong. I don’t want it getting rubbed with Wood Style.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for all the kudos on chapter 1! If you enjoyed chapter 2, drop a comment or kudo to let V know.
> 
> Chapter 3 to follow.


	3. Over or Under

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short and silly chapter today.

Chapter 3: Over or Under

Despite the foolishness of continuing the mission (Yamato asked Tsuande every day class was in session if he had to attend) Yamato found himself growing fond of the Academy. While the practical lessons proved to be things Yamato could have easily done in his sleep, history lessons and theories were enjoyable and Yamato found himself jotting down interesting facts he had never known or heard about. His classmates had quickly warmed up to their newest peer and while some of the awe remained, Yamato was now nothing more than another person in the room and someone who usually had answers when Iruka was busy with another student or had stumped the class.

“Today,” Iruka announced once the class had settled, “We’re going to do an obstacle course.”

As per the norm, excited whispers began. Iruka held up a finger.

“Before you get too eager, this is only a little one: there’s only one obstacle.”

Yamato blinked: one?

“Come outside and I’ll show you what we’ll be doing.”

The class crowded around Iruka and stared at a large solid wooden wall. It was at least ten feet tall and a foot thick. It spanned only a few feet left and right, but the students seemed intimidated by it.

“You challenge is to get to the other side,” Iruka said. “The only rule is that you’re not allowed to walk around it.”

Which, Yamato noted, suggested going over or under. The wood was too thick to simply blast through considering the age and skills of Iruka’s class.

“Well, go on. You have the rest of the afternoon to try,” Iruka encouraged.

The class began to break apart into groups while a few individuals got closer to the wall to inspect it.

“Only one rule?” Yamato asked Iruka quietly while the teacher surveyed his students.

“This lesson is more about thinking outside the box than actually accomplishing the task,” Iruka replied softly. “I like to see how creative my class can get.”

“Creative?”

“Mhm-hm. I’ve seen quite a few different ways to get past the wall.” Iruka began ticking off his fingers. “Teamwork seems to be the most common: students agree to make a human chain and climb up each other and help everyone get over. A few talented pupils have managed to walk up the wall if they’ve figured out how to concentrate chakra to their feet, but most only manage a few steps before falling. And finally, some spend their time digging: the wall isn’t too deep in the ground so it is possible to make a tunnel.”

Yamato nodded.

“I probably shouldn’t have told you how past students have been successful,” Iruka said. “So are you going to go over or under?”

“Neither. Through.”

Iruka frowned. “Please, Captain, don’t put a hole through my wall.”

“I don’t plan on it.”

Iruka watched Yamato walk over to the wall and press his palm against it. The other students gasped and began to bounce when Yamato stepped _into_ the wall. Iruka leaned slightly and found Yamato standing on the other side.

“Do I pass, Iruka-sensei?”

“Yes, Captain.”

Yamato stepped back into the wall and poked his head out to find his classmates bouncing excitedly.

“Can you teach us how to do that?”

“I’m afraid it’d take more than just this afternoon to learn,” Yamato said. “But I do have an idea of how to get everyone else to the other side.”

Yamato stepped out of the wall and bent over. He began to whisper and pointed to Iruka.

Iruka put his hands on his hips when the entirety of his class went over to him.

“Yes?” he asked.

“Iruka-sensei, can you help us?” the students, along with Yamato, chimed in unison.

Iruka smiled.

“You never said asking you for help wasn’t allowed,” Yamato said. “Only that we weren’t allowed to walk around.”

“I suppose that’s true.” Iruka nodded. “Alright, let’s see what we can do. Anyone have any other ideas besides going through the wall like Captain Yamato did?”

“Under!”

“Over!”

“Throw me!”

“I’m not going to throw _anyone_ ,” Iruka deadpanned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed chapter 3, drop a comment or kudo to let V know. And thank you to everyone who already left a comment or kudo! This fanfiction has already gotten over 100 hits. Wow!
> 
> Chapter 4 will follow but possibly not until next week: V is heading to NOLA on a mini-vacation in a few days. She will try to post chapter 4 before she leaves which then means that chapter 5 might be delayed.


	4. Try Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inappropriate use of Wood Style ahead. Also sassy!Iruka.

Chapter 4: Try Me

“Kakashi-san,” Iruka greeted when he found the man standing just outside his doorway. “What can I do for you?”

“Have you seen my kohai, Iruka-sensei? About this high, Wood Style user, didn’t bring his lunch?”

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “Depends, why do you need my student?”

“Your… student?”

“Yes, my student. Captain Yamato is currently enrolled is my class which makes him my pupil.”

“You do know that Tenzou’s here on a mission, right?” Kakashi stepped into the classroom and made a show of looking around. “On a technicality?”

“It doesn’t matter why Captain Yamato is here,” Iruka continued. He returned his attention to his paperwork. “Unfortunately for you, recess just started. Captain Yamato is probably outside.”

“Recess?”

“Yes, recess,” Iruka repeated. “Can I help you in some way?”

“I uh… Tenzou forget his lunch,” Kakashi said. He held up a lunchbox. “I was going to bring him something.”

“I can give it to him,” Iruka said. “You can leave it on my desk.”

“I was hoping to give it to him myself.” Kakashi slid up to the desk. “You see, I slaved all morning making this for him.”

Iruka didn’t raise his head. He tapped his desk with his finger.

“You can leave it. I know what you’re up to.”

“Up to? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “I’m a teacher: I’m not blind, and I’m certainly not deaf. I’ve heard about the laughingstock Captain Yamato has become since he took his mission amongst the _immature_ ninja of this village.”

Iruka’s emphasis of “immature” had Kakashi backing off slightly.

“He’s an ANBU agent who’s been sent back to the Academy in order to get a certificate that he doesn’t even need,” Iruka continued.

“You know he’s ANBU?”

Iruka looked up in exasperation. “You know, for a secret organization that swears its members to secrecy and has them wear masks, you’d think giving everyone tattoos which can be and are frequently displayed to the public might be a bad idea. Just a suggestion: lose the tattoos. It’s beyond obvious. That, and the fact that Captain Yamato is currently the only ninja who can use Wood Style in Konoha. It’s really hard to hide a twenty-foot log behind a cat mask.”

Kakashi nodded mutely.

“Lunch. Desk. Now.”

“But-”

“Kakashi-san. Now. I won’t have you bothering Captain Yamato during recess.”

“He’s probably getting mauled by those brats!” Kakashi protested but put the lunchbox down.

Iruka shook his head. He returned to his grading. “Everyone gets along fine. Captain Yamato is very popular.”

“Popular?” That was something Kakashi had never thought Tenzou could be. Especially with children.

“Mhm. He’s highly regarded by his peers. They all rave about what fun they all have.”

“Iruka-sensei, Tenzou is…”

A killing machine. ANBU. Probably not suited to dealing with children under thirteen. Probably not suited to dealing with children. Period.

“Very entertaining,” Iruka finished evenly. “You can take a peek outside and see what I mean. But do _not_ interrupt them.”

“Or what?”

“Or I’ll give you detention.”

Kakashi snorted.

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “You don’t think I’m serious?”

“Well… no.”

“I have your ANBU agent outside playing jump rope,” Iruka deadpanned. “I’ve convinced him that recess is now a mandatory class for him. Try me.”

“Tenzou’s doing what?”

“Are you deaf, Kakashi-san? Jump rope.”

Kakashi disappeared in an instant. Iruka sighed and shook his head.

“ANBU…”

Kakashi perched himself in one of the trees in the courtyard. Tenzou was seated under another one and Kakashi watched a number of children surrounding Tenzou pester him until the man finally relented and held both his hands out. They pulled and pushed him to his feet while others who couldn’t manhandle the ninja pointed excitedly at the tree.

Tenzou, with a smile on his face, pressed his hands against the tree and then leaned against them. He righted himself and began to walk backward; a long brown strand stretched from the tree to each palm and the children began to cheer. Kakashi frowned: what was Tenzou doing?

“Alright,” Tenzou said before beginning to turn the tendrils. “One at a time.”

A girl hopped into the wooden vines and began to jump while the other children formed a line.

“Ninjas know lots of things, hand seal signs and chakra strings,” the girl sing-songed. “Bloodline limits, time bomb minutes, headband plates and mission rates.”

Tenzou continued to spin. He joined in the rhyme.

“On a mission, good condition, stopped to take a break. Enemy ninja on the way, up at ‘em, get away! On a branch that’s split in two, how many jutsus can you do? One, two, three, four…”

When the girl’s foot caught the vine and she tripped, the next person in line stepped up. He frowned and pointed.

“I can’t do two,” he said.

Tenzou transferred one of the tendrils into his opposite hand; the wood melted into one solid piece and then he began to spin.

“Ninjas know lots of things, hand seal signs and chakra strings. Bloodline limits, time bomb minutes, headband plates and mission rates.”

Once recess was over and the children began to head inside, Tenzo wandered over to the tree Kakashi was in and looked up at the branch with his hands on his hips.

“Why didn’t you take a turn?” Kakashi asked.

“They’re all too short to turn the rope high enough for me,” Tenzou replied. “Iruka-sensei sometimes joins us though. He’s tall enough.”

Kakashi snorted. Tenzou glared when the man reached back to one of his pouches.

“Senpai, if you try to read one of _those_ types of books in front of my classmates, I’ll shove my hand so far up your ass you’ll be spitting out splinters for a week.”

That was not an idle threat: Kakashi had seen Tenzou get extremely creative with enemies.

“Tenzou-”

“Yamato.”

“You and Iruka-sensei are no fun. And he never brought you your lunch!” Kakashi made a show of sounding thoroughly upset and offended. “And I worked so hard on it.”

“Thank you, but I don’t need it.”

Tenzou turned around and began to head back toward the Academy. Kakashi dropped down from the tree and followed.

“Why not? Did you remember to bring your own today?”

“No. Iruka-sensei brought me lunch.”

Tenzou held the door open. Kakashi stopped.

“Iruka-sensei never brought me lunch when I helped him with classes.”

How many times had he come to give special lectures and only got a “thank you very much for your time”?

“I don’t help with classes,” Tenzou said. “I’m technically his student.”

Kakashi stuffed his hands into his pockets and continued on.

“What happens he doesn’t bring you food?”

“My classmates share their lunches with me. They’re very generous. And, if I’m desperate, I keep some change on my person for the vending machine.”

The two paused outside Iruka’s classroom.

“You should probably leave now, senpai,” Tenzou said.

“What? Why?”

“Because I have to go to class and they might get… overexcited if you come in.”

“Overexcited?”

“How you ever died?”

Kakashi tilted his head. “Well, I suppose in a technical sense-”

“What’s your favorite jutsu? Did you come to kill someone? Can you show us some cool techniques?” Tenzou rattled off. “Iruka-sensei is very good about getting them under control, but it’s better to not rile them up in the first place.”

“Since when did you become such a child expert, Tenzou?”

“Yamato. And I’m not an expert. Goodybe, senpai. Thank you for lunch.”

Tenzou headed into the classroom and Kakashi poked his around the door only to find Iruka glaring at him.

“Detention,” the teacher mouthed. “After school, today, if you don’t leave this instant.”

Kakashi merely waved. Iruka turned his attention to his class and smiled.

“Now that we’re all back, why don’t we discuss our field trip that’s coming up? I’m still looking for chaperones.”

Kakashi made a tactical retreat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed chapter 4, drop a comment or kudo to let V know.
> 
> Gord suggested that ANBU get tramp stamps. V would agree, but considering the number of ninjas that have their midriffs exposed, she doesn’t think it would help the problem when agents are out of uniform.
> 
> V is very proud of her jump rope rhyme. She would have gone with Teddy Bear but thought a ninja-themed one would be more fun. Both Gord and V are able to jump rope and double-dutch.
> 
> As mentioned in the previous chapter, chapter 5 will be delayed. But, if all goes well, the next chapter should be out sometime Sunday/Monday. Stay tuned!


	5. Field Trip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> V is back from NOLA! She got to visit de bayou (as the locals call it) and hold a baby gator. She also did a whole bunch of other things, but no one wants to hear about that.
> 
> V isn't 100% familiar with Naruto canon so she got creative in this chapter.

Chapter 5: Field Trip

“I thought I told Lady Tsunade you could be excused from the field trip,” Iruka said. “I’m sure you’ve come here more than once.”

More than a few times. Yamato, can you fix that post in Training Field 3. Can you add some more trees to Field 5? Can you help a team in the Forest of Death avoid getting eaten alive by some monstrous creature? He’d probably been to every field at least once.

“I’ve been to this training ground a few times,” Tenzou replied as he looked around the clearing and focused on five tall wooden pillars that he had set up a few weeks ago: they were already slashed and chipped but standing solid.

“I’m sorry this isn’t interesting for you,” Iruka apologized. “But I’ve had this planned for a few weeks now and the children were so excited so see where real ninja come to practice. I don’t understand why Lady Tsunade didn’t excuse you like I asked her to. I’m sure you have more interesting things to do.”

Tenzou shrugged.

“Don’t wander too far,” Iruka called to his class. “Stay where I can see you.”

Iruka and Tenzou remained under the shade of one of the surrounding trees. The children continued to explore the clearing and a few had already approached the wooden pillars and were poking and prodding them with interest, looking at the jagged lines left behind as evidence from fully-fledged ninjas’ practice.

“Iruka-sensei, why are there animal heads on top?”

“Is it to keep away bad spirits?”

Iruka looked at Tenzou who held his hands up and shrugged.

“I was bored when I made them.”

“They’re just for decoration,” Iruka explained. He tensed. “No, do not stick your finger in that hole! No! Don’t do it!”

“Iruka-sensei, my finger’s stuck!”

Iruka sighed in exasperation. “I’ll be right back, Captain Yamato.”

Yamato watched Iruka all but storm over to one of his students and begin to gesture and shout while the child simply continued to smile and twist his finger which was stuck in the wooden pillar: Yamato would go to help and simply widen the hole in a few minutes once Iruka was done with his tirade about common sense and following instructions if he couldn’t free the finger.

Yamato slapped a hand against his covered neck with a grimace: he had been out on enough mission to know how bad bugs could bite, but Konoha’s insects usually weren’t this bad. He looked at his palm, expecting to find the squished remnants of a bug, and he did. But…

Yamato had seen numerous bugs in his life, some a part of a nature and some used as weapons, and this was certainly the latter. Despite the rainbow sheen on the bug’s shiny black cracked shell, Yamato could see tiny mechanisms and broken bits of metal. It was no bigger than his nail, and Yamato shook his hand slightly in apparent disgust before pulling a handkerchief from one of his many pockets as if to wipe the mess away: it was quite a good imitation of a real bug, but the slight wetness on Yamato’s hand wasn’t from any natural bodily fluids that a true insect would have if it had been swatted.

The smell was potent. Even without bringing his hand closer to his face, Yamato could recognize a commonly used poison with a hint of something else he couldn’t place. His sense of smell might not have been as good as Kakashi’s or the Inuzaka’s, but years of training and first-hand experience made identifying common hazardous liquids easy.

The little mechanical insect was nothing more than a stylized senbon. Most people would have swatted at the bug and wiped their hand without being any wiser that they had been poisoned. But now Yamato had the advantage since he had recognized the threat: the poison wasn’t deadly, not immediately immobilizing, and it he gave him a few minutes of time to make and execute a plan.

“Iruka-sensei, let’s play a game!” Yamato called as he began to stride over to the wooden pillars where most of the class had gathered to watch their teacher try and free their classmate’s finger.

“Not right now, Captain,” Iruka replied shortly. “I think I might have to amputate a finger.”

“What? No! Don’t let him, Captain Yamato!”

Alerting Iruka that they were under attack was priority number one. Number two was keeping everyone calm and collected. Everyone was far enough from the trees that the chances of another insect bite should have been low. Yamato silently continued his countdown in his head.

“We really should play a game,” Yamato insisted as he reached a hand out to the pillar and the hole around the finger immediately widened: the boy grinned and rubbed at his sore digit. Yamato stared at Iruka and gave him a pointed look. “We could play enemy ninja are attacking,” he suggested: Iruka barely dipped his chin in understanding. “Or we could play my favorite game.”

“What’s your favorite game?”

“Can I play?”

“Can Iruka-sensei play?”

“We can all play,” Yamato said as he removed his hand from the pillar and began looking around: a few other classmates remained scattered around the training field. “Why don’t we play Wood Style hide-and-seek?”

The children clapped and voiced their enthusiasm. Yamato’s fingers were already tingling and going numb.

“I’m going to hide everyone,” Yamato explained. “And then I have to find everyone.”

A few students groaned.

“That’s not fair!”

“If you hide us, you’ll find us right away!”

“I won’t know where I hid you,” Yamato said patiently while the paralysis crept up his arms. “On the count of three, everyone spread out. Ready? One. Two. Three!”

All the students took off in different directions. Iruka looked slightly concerned and watched Yamato attempt to raise his hands to form hand seals and fail. The man’s face pinched and he shifted his stance slightly. Wooden domes began to pop up around the training field: some covered the children and Iruka noticed that others covered nothing. The domes began to move and Iruka nodded to himself: even if anyone attempted to hurt the students, there was chance they’d miss and hit an empty wooden shell as they rearranged themselves around the field.

“Reinforcements should be here in minutes,” Iruka whispered while Yamato stepped closer to him before they were engulfed in wood. “Once everyone was covered I sent out an emergency chakra flare.”

Yamato nodded and then sat down.

“Captain, are you alright?” Iruka asked.

“No. Yes. Poison.” Yamato couldn’t feel his legs. “Temporary paralytic. Nothing dangerous.”

Because while it’d be dangerous for Yamato to be immobilized and alone, at least he’d still be able to breathe while the rest of his body went limp. He’d heard horror stories of rare venoms and poisons paralyzing ninja and slowly suffocating them when their insides shut down. Yamato would be alive and defenseless but not dying.

“Can you keep all your domes up when you’re paralyzed?” Iruka asked.

Yamato nodded. “For a while.”

“What can I do to help?”

“Keep me safe.”

It seemed to take only seconds for the numbness to finish spreading upwards. One moment Yamato was able to keep himself upright and next he was falling over to one side, unable to catch himself or put a hand out. Iruka grabbed a fistful of his vest and eased him down.

“Still alright?”

Yamato nodded.

“Can you bring this dome down? I’m anxious not being able to see everyone.”

Yamato managed a questioning look. Iruka smiled down at him and then pulled a kunai. He stepped over Yamato and assumed a defensive position.

“I’ll keep you safe.”

The wood sunk into the ground. Yamato wished he could turn his head because he heard the sound of steel on steel and saw Iruka begin to sway back and forth above him, presumably to keep them both safe.

“Kakashi-san!” Iruka sounded surprised.

“What happened to Yamato?” Definitely Kakashi’s voice.

How had he gotten to the training field so quickly? Yamato inwardly frowned since his face was frozen: Kakashi had probably followed the class and wound up reading some of his smut in a tree far enough away that neither Yamato nor Iruka would notice his presence.

“Temporary paralytic,” Iruka replied. “He said he’s fine.”

“Fine?”

“I presume he meant in the sense that the poison wasn’t overly dangerous to his health.”

“Ah.”

“My students,” Iruka began. “They think Captain Yamato’s playing a game with them.”

“What game?” Kakashi asked.

“Wood Style hide-and-seek. Some of the domes are empty.”

Yamato scowled when Kakashi leaned over him. Or, at least, he tried to.

“Yo,” Kakashi greeted. “No need to get up on my account.”

Hahaha. Very funny.

“Cat got your tongue, eh? Not to worry, I know you’re a man of few words. One might even say you’re unwilling to branch out.”

Damn Kakashi and his tree puns!

“I know, I know,” Kakashi continued. “Once you can move you’re going to strangle me. This isn’t the time to joke.”

Damn right!

“I suppose we should get everyone in one place while we wait for reinforcements,” Kakashi said out loud. “Still no idea how many enemies are out there. Can you drop the shells, Yamato?”

Yamato couldn’t move: he remained totally limp. A few of his wooden domes began to crack open but then stopped.

“Er, Yamato?” Kakashi began.

Damn it! Yamato knew that the poison had smelled a bit off. This was not the standard paralytic the ANBU was familiar with.

“I guess you can’t remove the domes?” Kakashi said a tad unsurely. “No problem.”

Yamato heard the tell-tale crackle and chirp of Kakashi’s Chidori and glimpsed a blueish flickering light from the corner of his eye.

“Watch my back, Iruka-sensei?” Kakashi requested.

“What about Captain Yamato?”

“He’s basically at the center of all this: we’re going to start from the outside and work our way in, bring all your students here. If anyone tries to attack, we’ll be close enough to stop it no matter where we are.”

At least Kakashi had remembered to ask for someone to watch his back: he was down one Sharingan, up one functional (but normal) eye.

“Let’s go.”

Iruka finished stepping over Yamato and spared a single look at the downed man before he moved out of view. Yamato heard the sound of wood cracking seconds later and a loud, slightly annoyed shout of, “you’re not Captain Yamato! Cheater!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed chapter 5, drop a comment or kudo to let V know.
> 
> Last chapter to follow!


	6. Insensitive Gift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course Iruka’s class (and Yamato) were rescued and the enemy ninja captured. (Kakashi was most likely sent into timeout for “cheating” in hide-and-seek.)
> 
> Here's the final chapter of Tenzou's Academy Adventures! Enjoy!

Chapter 6: Insensitive Gift

Yamato wished all his hospital stays could have been as pleasant as this one. Granted, being stuck in bed with nothing to do but stare at the rather bland walls wasn’t very entertaining, but considering the amount of pain he was in, (none) the tradeoff seemed fair. Unlike other paralytic poisons, none of Yamato’s muscles had stiffened up which meant no soreness as the effects slowly wore off.

Some poisons were best left to their own devices, or so said the nurses: antidotes could, potentially, cause complications if they weren’t administered properly, and so for Yamato’s sake, they would simply let it work itself out of the man’s system. Boring, but not painful.

A knock at the door drew Yamato from his thoughts.

“Captain,” Iruka greeted as he stepped into the room, followed by a number of large and colorful balloons. “I hope it’s alright if I visit for a little while.”

Yamato wished he could have answered. Or nodded. Or done anything.

Iruka didn’t seem bothered by the silence.

“I wanted to make sure you were alright, and the students threatened to come here themselves if I didn’t deliver your get well soon presents today. I didn’t think it’d be a good idea to have them all come visit at once.”

That was true: the hospital would be overrun. Iruka tied the balloons to a lone chair.

“I thought anything plant-related might be an insensitive gift. I convinced the class that balloons were better.” Iruka looked at a potted cactus beside Yamato on a small table and note attached to it. He pursed his lips and the scar across his nose wrinkled slightly in distaste. “I see that Kakashi-san had no such qualms. He didn’t give you his porn to read, did he?”

Yamato snorted. Or tried to. It was more like a little hiccup of noise. Iruka smiled. He reached behind his back and then offered a stack of papers.

“All your cards from the class,” he said before slipping the edges under the cactus. “I’ll just leave them here for you to read later. And this…”

Where was Iruka _keeping_ everything?

“Lady Tsunade said you earned this,” Iruka continued as he held up a diploma. “But the class insisted that you come back for one more day just so they can say goodbye. As a warning, they’re going to try and weasel you into coming back to visit and play jump rope with them. You’re certainly more than welcome to come visit us if you’d like, but jump roping is optional.”

Iruka moved into Yamato’s direct line of vision.

“Thank you for everything. I’m not sure I could have protected all my students like you were able to do. Thank you.”

Yamato wished he could have brushed aside Iruka’s praise: the man would have done the same thing. He settled for a long blink instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for all the kudos and comments! For any anonymous readers, V hopes you enjoyed following along. Writing this silly little piece was very fun. Thanks again for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed chapter 1, leave a comment or kudo to let V know.
> 
> Chapters should be posted every 2-3 days. But if you read "Konoha Kennels," you know that sometimes V gets busy with her dogs at work and may get delayed.
> 
> Chapter 2 to follow.


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